veritas vos liberabit

never leave home without the press pass.
cuz shit like the WBC can happen and i wanna get out there first.

but hello, i’d rather be sipping a frrrozen hot chocolate in the upper east side of manhattan rather than the las vegas strip.

i probably should have written this yesterday, but i was so freakishly tired that i couldn’t sit down and blog.

so yesterday, WBC (westboro baptist church, known for being super extreme anti-gay/anti-jewish…actually damn, they freaking hate everyone. i just read the wiki page.) came to lowell. so, i honestly don’t see the point in coming to san francisco- i love my liberal city, haha. but that’s okay.

so in the few days before the protest different events littered facebook and lowell’s announcements- a jewish gay block party, a counterprotest, ignoring the WBC, wellness center helping people cope with the situation in the choir room, a peaceful counterprotest headed by admin at the flagpole. they were all interesting enough. but the admin ended up swooping and everything ended up merging with them. which was cool enough because they had the big rally speakers and we all danced the hora and danced to lady gaga (yeah, WBC hates her too.)

there was an intense amount of love within the lowell community, i swear. it was amazing to see. we also had supporters, but the police came and barricaded lowell so that WBC couldn’t get to us, but they also wouldnt allow the people who supported in either until after WBC left and then we all partied together. saw my lincoln homies. saw sota homies too! it was awesome, i swear.

*someone brought to my attention yesterday some WBC member was holding a sign that said fags are beasts… just think about that in slang terms XD

you’re my inspiration.

Because as much as I do love you, I’m scared. I’m scared that you’ll hate me forever, I’m scared that I’ll lose you. That fear connects to a lot of other things that have happened in my life- I’m tired of losing the ones I love because of trivial things (and well, the occasional not-so-trivial-thing). I let you into my life for a reason and that’s why when I ask “Why do I know you?”, your answer is unacceptable. I know you because you ended up being someone I could rely on, someone I felt like myself around. I didn’t have to keep crushing on you. I could have stopped. So no, it’s not just because I liked you. You were the first person who could accept me for who I really am and you showed me that I could have a little more faith in people, but… it doesn’t seem like that anymore. And that scares me as well.

But I apologize to you all the time.
Never once have you thought to apologize to me for making me feel like shit no matter how many times you’ve done it.
I love you, but I’m tired of having this double standard in our friendship.
Things need to change. Agreements need to be reached, because honestly, I’m getting tired of getting the short end of the stick - you can’t control me.

Realize that.

thank you, diana for telling me to listen to it ♥